The Understanding
by dont fail
Summary: Savannah never knew that attending the Giants game would change her life forever. Unexpectedly meeting Tim Lincecum and cautiously becoming his friend ultimately lead to her realize that there is more to life than she understood.
1. Chapter 1

Here I sat in a sea of black and orange as one of the few Phillies fans in the AT&T ballpark stadium. I could count on my hand how many red shirts and hats i've seen since first entering the stadium over an hour ago, this is the Giants territory after all. I was betraying my fellow Bay Area friends by wearing a red hoodie with 'Phillies' embroidered across the front, and lets not forget my red and white long tank top that I wore under my hoodie that I pulled down to end right above my butt. I knew by the end of this intense game I would be facing angry slurs that I knew would find me, which I completely understood and mentally braced myself for. I was a lone ranger today, riding my truck alone to the Bart station in Walnut Creek, sitting by myself through the entire ride into the city and then making my way onto Muni. Today was a stressful day, here I was alone and fighting off crazy Giants fans that assumed that they were the best team around. Everywhere I turned I saw orange shirts, jackets, hats, and the panda bear hats that graced the heads of many females and children. I sat on the edge of my seat the entire game, jumping up and fist pumping as Chase Utley hit a home run. The looks from the crowd was terrifying and I was nervous that I would have a drink thrown at me by the end of the 7th inning. I'm not a very big girl at all, in fact I'm far from intimidating. Standing 5'6, twenty two years old, thin frame, long brown hair, black rimmed glasses and bright green eyes defined me as a person. I can proudly say that I've worn black rimmed glasses since I hit double digits, and at first it irritated me when I saw that black frames became a trend and that everyone began to wear them. Ryan Howard, one of the best players in the eyes of many Phillies fans, held the bat tightly in his hands. Strike one- the crowd goes crazy. Ryan had his second strike and I gripped my seat in fear of him striking out again and him causing three outs. Fortunately for Howard, when Tim Lincecum threw a fast ball Howard swung the bat as hard as he could and hit the ball across the field and over the stadium. I watched the Giants water counter go up a digit as Howard ran the bases and made his way home. Since the AT&T ballpark was right next to the bay, literally right next to it, anytime a player hit a ball out of the stadium and into the water the counter on the stadium wall would go up. Right now the water counter stood at 58.

As the game came to a finish after a long and cold day I was proud to be a Phillies fan even more. We won 6-2 and boy was I screaming from excitement on the inside, of course I tried to keep a calm face as the fans surrounding me started booing and cursing at me. Doing a silent dance I watched as the fans stood up from their seats and began to file out of the isles. I kept my seat warm for an extra hour in fear that I would be badly harassed or even hurt if I filed out with Giants fans. My face was too pretty to be hit, at least thats what I was telling myself. I soon found myself standing and stretching. Looking around I saw fans lingering around in hopes to find their favorite player so they could get an autograph, what a waste of time I thought. Walking up the stairs and onto the main path of the stadium I walked past the closed food stands, hoping to find the garlic fries stand still open, I had the unfortunate luck of walking into someone. Of course, clumsy me walked so hard into the person I fell down onto my knees. I hung my head in shame, my hair covering my face, my hands plastered on the dirty floors. Wiping my hands onto my jeans I pushed my hair from my face and looked up expecting to see some bulky drunk guy in a Giants shirt just waiting to ream me another one. I scrunched my forehead and eyes as I looked at the guy standing in front of me. I wish a fat drunk man stood in front of me, but of course not, of all people I ran into it had to be a Giants player. And not just any Giants player, but the attractive pitcher- Tim Lincecum.

He smiled at me and held out a hand, a friendly gesture for someone who just lost a game. I grabbed it and stood up, brushing off my knees and legs before looking into his green eyes before thanking him.

"You didn't have to do that," I started, smiling softly, "I'm terribly sorry for walking into you. I didn't see you.." I bit my bottom lip and looked away. This was the most embarrassing thing that I could think of that has happened to me. Of all days I run into an attractive man he has to be a baseball player and I have to be wearing the opposing team colors.

"Its okay, are you alright? You fell pretty hard." He looked down at my hands as I held my palms up, they were dirty and red and hurt like a bitch. "You might want to clean your hands and get them looked at, you have no idea what could be festering on these floors." I laughed and nodded.

"Yeah, you're probably right. But its nothing that hand sanitizer can't take care of! It does kill 99.9% of germs, after all." I pulled my hand sanitizer from my purse and squirted a healthy glob onto my hands before rubbing the liquid into my palms. My eyes widened and I gasped as my hands burned as if they were on fire. Tim laughed, somehow finding humor in my pain.

"Come on, i'll take you to get your hands looked at. But first you have to take off that hoodie, I can't be seen walking around with a Phillies fan." He raised his eyebrow at me and crossed his arms over his chest. Boy was this man attractive and such a dick.

"No thanks, I don't think so. I understand that you're on the other team but that does not constitute me having to remove my clothing. I'm not a prostitute or a whore, and do not remove clothing on command. Thank you for your concern, have a nice day." I spoke firmly and walked past him. How dare he say that he cannot be seen with me because i'm wearing red. Fuck him. If anything I should be the one concerned being seen with him. What if someone snaps a picture of us and posts it on the internet? My family would have my head if they saw me talking to their nemesis.

"Wait! Hey! Wait!" I could hear his footsteps behind me, echoing in deserted hallway as he made his way to my side. "I was kidding, I swear. I really don't mind it, I really don't. You have serious balls for even coming here wearing a Phillies hoodie, I think you're a brave girl." He looked over at me and grinned, I didn't find this amusing.

"Thank you, but as I said already, have a nice day. Sorry for your loss, maybe next time you'll win." I made my way down the ramp that I walked up when first arriving to the stadium. I was irritated and my hands hurt, but the fact that he walked beside me made me nervous.

"Whats your name? I'm Tim. Tim Lincecum."

"Savannah." I replied curtly. I just wanted to leave this place and find food before jumping onto Muni to the Bart station.

"Thats a very nice name..is this your first time in San Francisco?"

"No, I live here in the Bay Area."

"I'm guessing your from Philadelphia?" I nodded before stepping into the bright sunlight. Finally free of the long ramps in the stadium I sighed as I looked for the Muni train. Just my luck, there were no trains at the stop to the left. Damnit, I should have left earlier and dealt with the asshole fans.

"Taking Muni, i'm assuming?" I nodded, so many questions for such a short period of time.

I ran my hand through my hair and sighed. I had no idea how to get home from here even though I was slightly familiar with the surrounding area. I remember walking past the stadium once before many years ago with a few friends, but what direction I came from was a mystery and how I got home was even more questionable. Damnit, I knew I should have brought my dads GPS with me.

"Just taking a shot here..you have no idea where you're going?" He looked in the direction I was looking in and then looked down at me. He was pretty tall, he had to have been at least five inches taller than me.

"Yeah, I have no idea. I'm so fucked. And Muni isn't here, I guess I could wait at the stop or just walk until I can catch a cab." I looked down the street in hopes to find a small sandwich shop. I was starving, it was my own stupidity for not eating lunch here at the ballpark.

"How about this, wait here and i'll get my stuff and i'll pull my car up and i'll take you to the Bart station..if thats where you're going?"

"Bart is my ultimate goal." I looked up into his eyes. "But I don't expect to get a ride from you. Don't worry, i'll find a way myself."

"I would not feel comfortable letting some girl walk the city alone, especially since you have no idea where you're going. Just wait, i'll get my things really quickly and i'll pull my car up. Please wait." He looked concerned, he really shouldn't be concerned. I highly doubt i'd get hurt, plus, all I wanted to do first was eat anyway. I could get directions from a server or use my phone to call a cab.

"Okay," I muttered, defeated. "I'll be sitting here waiting for you." I plopped myself down on the cement steps and pulled my iPhone from my purse. I saw his shadow turn and disappear. I contemplated if I should just leave without him, but he seemed pretty persistent and concerned about my wellbeing. It didn't take long at all before I saw a white porsche pull up to the curb, window rolled down and his goofy smiling face looking over at me.

"Come on, hop in!" I could hear blues music seeping out from his car before I even stood up from the steps. My insides quivered as I watched his face carefully as I walked towards his car, opened the door and slid inside. Not only did I bump into a drop dead gorgeous man, fall, bust my palms up, but now i'm riding in a porsche next to the man I just met.

"Holy fucking shit. This is the nicest car i've ever been in." I exclaimed as I fastened my seatbelt and looked around. Perfect dark leather interior surrounded me, and I breathed in the smell of the fresh leather.

"HA! Thanks! I love this car, its very fast." Tim revved his engine and laughed. Turning to me he smiled and continued, "Thank you for waiting for me. I was afraid i'd have to search the streets for you! Are you hungry? I'm famished and need something to eat." He rubbed his stomach before griping the steering wheel and pushed the gas pedal and raced us away from the stadium.

"I am extremely hungry, I haven't eaten since this morning." I looked out my window and watched as we passed buildings and people.

"What are you in the mood for?"

"Im not very picky, as long as I can eat somewhere that I can have a non-meat meal." He looked at me crossly before nodding.

"So much for not being picky!" He laughed and I joined in.

"I'm not! I'll eat anywhere really..." I trailed off and watched as we approached a large apartment complex.

"Thats good to know. Sorry, I have to let my dog out. He's been inside all day and I don't want to come home to a mess. Do you want to wait here or come inside?" We pulled into a numbered parking spot and he turned his engine off before turning to me.

"Err..well..I can stay here." I nervously looked at him. I don't even know this guy! For all I know he could be a serial killer at night!

"Nonsense, come on. You're coming with me. If anyone sees you in here they might call the police for thinking you broke into my car." We both laughed and slid out of the small white car. I followed him as we stepped into a luxurious elevator. I turned and looked down as he pushed a small black button on the panel and pushed a few of the buttons. I'm assuming he put a code in because right after he pushed the buttons the elevator lifted.

It didn't take long before the doors opened to an hallway filled with black and white photos of San Francisco. I felt a little sick as I looked out the massive windows that lined the left side of the building. We were so high up that people looked like ants from up here. I followed Tim as we walked a bit down the hallway before stopping in front of a dark mahogany door. He put his key into the lock and turned, pushed the door open, and walked into his apartment. I followed suite and looked around. Total bachelor pad. An impressive kitchen with granite tops graced the left side of the apartment. I watched as Tim walked down a large hallway and disappeared. I ran my hand over the black lacquered bar stools that sat at the granite table tops. Black leather couches sat in front of a gigantic television. I noticed that an xBox Elite, Playstation 3 and a Wii laid on the floor under the mounted television. Clearly this guy was as single as they get, I laughed to myself. I walked around a pool table that was fitted with grey fabric, touching it ever so softly before walking by the door and waited for Tim to return. I could hear his voice faintly as I waited for him patiently. I could hear a dog barking excitingly. Soon enough I could hear paws pounding on the cherry wood hard wood floors and was faced with a small white French bulldog.

"His name is Cy, he's really friendly." Tim said as I watched him walk towards me. Cy was jumping around my legs and panting loudly, I bent down and pet his soft fur and mentioned how cute he was.

"Everyone says he's way cuter than I am. He gets the ladies, thats for sure." I laughed and watched Tim lean against the granite counter tops. I sat indian style on the floors and rubbed Cy. Damn, this dog was so cute and so sweet.

"I love him! I want him!" I laughed, taking the dogs small squished face into my hands and giving him a kiss. I grinned and stood up, brushing myself off and looked over at Tim. "Well, are you ready now?" I smiled at his cheerful face. He nodded, walked over to his front door, opened it and held it open for me. He held the door open with his long muscular arm and I ducked under it as I left his apartment. He followed me and locked the door before we walked side by side to the elevator.


	2. Chapter 2

I tapped my foot eagerly on the floor as we descended in the elevator. I was so hungry I was contemplating on if I should eat my arm.

"Cy really liked you!" Tim looked over at me and smiled, I nodded and smiled back.

"And I really liked him. I love dogs, they are there for you no matter what and they don't judge you." I watched the side of his face as he pushed his hair behind his ear, sensing me looking at him he turned and winked at me. I could feel my cheeks blush instantly and cleared my throat. The elevator doors soon opened and I stepped out and onto the concrete, breathing in the chilly San Francisco air.

I walked alongside Tim and climbed into his low riding car once he unlocked the doors. The fresh smell of leather hit my senses and I grinned as I looked over at him.

"Did I tell you that i'm going to steal your car? Because i'm going to, it smells amazing in here." Tim laughed and put the car into reverse and sped out of the garage.

"I'll hunt you down if you do. Don't make me do that." I saw a cheeky smile plastered across his face as he stared intently on the road in front of him.

"What do you want to eat? Are you in the mood for anything in particular?"

"Um..can we get Subway or something?"

"Subway? Really? Of all places here in SF you pick Subway?" He raised his eyebrow as he glanced over at me. I could feel myself become self conscious.

"Well, its super cheap and i'm not made of money over here." I looked out the passenger window in embarrassment. I can't believe I just put my foot in my mouth like that. I'm sure he doesn't surround himself with working class people who work a 9 to 5 job, I thought and mentally hit myself.

"I'll pay, don't worry." I whipped my head to the left and stared at him.

"No thank you. I can pay for myself. Plus, what if one of your fans sees you pay for a females lunch? I rather not put you into a situation where you have to explain yourself."

"You sitting in my car is putting me in, what you call, a situation. It's not like were on a date, right? I'm just taking a nice girl out to lunch. For all they know i'm trying to persuade you into becoming a Giants fan." He grinned and pulled the car into an empty spot in front of Subway.

"I should probably let you know this, but i'll always be a Phillies fan until the day I die. I could date Alex Rodriguez and would still be a Phillies fan." I stated as I slid out of the car and looked over at Tim as he locked the doors.

"What if your future boyfriend, Alex Rodriguez, leaves you for supporting the opposite team?" He held the door open for me and I walked in and up to the counter, eyeing all the fantastic veggies before turning to Tim.

"Honestly, i'd leave him. If the man I date cannot understand that we will have differences then there no point in being with him. If he wanted to be with me he would be happy that I wasn't all gung-ho about everything he does." I looked at the lady behind the desk and told her I wanted the Veggie Delite. The poor girl behind the desk couldn't keep her eyes off Tim and asked for his autograph once she finished making our food.

"Sure! Whats your name?" He smiled as he grabbed a napkin, writing a short message about how much he appreciated her being a fan before signing his name.

We walked over to a table at the side of the restaurant that was seated against the wall, which I thought seemed a bit odd since we were the only customers inside the place.

"So, do you have a boyfriend? Surely a girl like you is taken." He bit into his meaty sandwich and looked at me.

"Boyfriend? You mean my imaginary one?" He thought this was humorous, sad thing was is that I have not dated in a few years. Not that I don't want to be in a relationship, but its that I have not met someone I thought was a good match for me.

"You're lying, I really don't believe you." He was in disbelief.

"Swear, i'm single. As single as they get." I wiped my mouth off with my napkin and took a sip from my drink.

"Why? I don't understand? Not only are you interesting, funny, beautiful but you're also witty." Did he just call me beautiful? Now thats hilarious.

"I just can't find the extra piece to my puzzle. I'm sure once I find that piece i'll know, but it just hasn't come along yet. I don't want to date someone because i'm bored and lonely, I want to date someone because were meant for each other. What about you?"

"Single. Sadly. Its hard to trust girls when you work in this business, everyone is either after the fame or the money. Believe me, the fame and money isn't everything that everyone imagines it being. I go to bed alone and wake up alone. People assume that because i'm some sort of popular baseball player that I take women to bed all the time- their wrong." Tim looked out the window and frowned, clearly this was something that bothered him tremendously.

"I'm sure there is a girl out there for you, theres someone out there for everyone. I have faith that you'll meet the perfect woman for you." I smiled softy and reached out and touched his hand gently. "Really, don't worry about it. When it happens, it happens." Tim nodded in agreement as he stared at me intently.

"I can't believe i'm having this conversation with some girl I met today, and even more ridiculous is that she's a Phillies fan." He grinned, and drank some of his soda.

"There's nothing wrong with being a Phillies fan. Who knows, maybe next time I go to your games i'll be wearing one of those shirts with your hat and hair, they seem to be very popular these days." I laughed lightly and leaned back in my chair, pushing my sleeves up to my elbow.

"Oh man! Now that will be the day! So you're saying you'll be coming back to watch us play? Or just me?" He smiled which caused me to blush slightly. I bit my cheek and pondered a good answer to his question.

"I'll come just to prove that red isn't the only color i'll wear." Stupid response, but that was all I could come up with.

"I'll hold you to that, maybe i'll get you a Giants jersey? We have another game in three days..will you be there?" Tim looked down quickly and picked a piece of bread off his sandwich.

"I don't have tickets..and if its during the week i'm working until 5pm." Was he really asking me to come and watch him play?

"How about this, I get you a ticket and pay you for the loss of wages that you'll lose that day from missing work?"

I couldn't help but laugh, blush, and smile at the same time. Damn, I have no idea where this subject was going.

"Thats very nice of you to say, but I rather not have you pay me to come see you play. Are you playing this weekend?"

"Yeah, we are. Does this mean you'll come and watch the game?" He grinned and leaned forward making me instantly nervous. Our eyes held each others gazes, me quickly breaking the stare and looking down at my hands.

"Maybe. If I can afford to buy tickets." I looked up quickly and smiled.

"How about I get you tickets? I can get you really good seats."

"If you really want me to watch you play, then i'll come and watch you play."

Tim smiled, stood up and stretched his hand out for me to grab. Nervously I grabbed it and stood up and dropped his hand. We made our way out of the restaurant after trashing our food and hopped back into his car. We zoomed through the streets of San Francisco before I noticed we were making our way back to his apartment. I was a little uneasy as we pulled back into the numbered parking spot.

"Why are we back here?" I said as I climbed out of the car and looked over at him. He pushed his hair back from his face and pulled a hat onto his head that he grabbed from the back of his car.

"I have the shirt you were talking about, I want you to have it so you can wear it to the game!" He looked over at me and smiled. I was only kidding about the shirt when I mentioned it earlier, I sure as hell didn't think he took me seriously.

"Oh, you don't have to give me your shirt Tim..its alright. I don't want you to give away a piece of your clothing." We boarded the elevator and he pushed the black button and entered his code.

"As if i'll ever wear it, it has my face on it!" He chuckled.

The elevator came to a halt and the doors opened to the long hallway surrounded by large windows and black and white photos of San Francisco. We were soon at his door again that was quickly unlocked and pushed open. The sound of paws on the hardwood floors filled my ears and I quickly looked around for the small white dog. Soon enough Cy appeared, running straight for his master and jumping on his legs.

"Hey, boy! I'm back! Gotta go out?" Tim led the dog down a hallway and disappeared from sight.

Back in this place again, I thought to myself. The bachelor pad that many people rarely see, and I was the lucky one who was brought here twice. Girls would kill for this opportunity, but then again, girls would kill just to be around Tim for ten minutes.

I watched as Tim walked towards me from the hallway with a smile on his lips and a bright orange shirt in his hands. He walked to me and handed me the the shirt and smiled at me.

"Here it is! All yours! Want to try it on?" He grinned as he passed the shirt to me. I held it in my hands and looked down at it.

"I guess I could try it on, if you really want me to?" I looked up at him and sheepishly smiled.

"Yeah! Let me see how orange and black looks on you." He watched as I pulled my hoodie over my head and took it from me once I was free of the fabric. I held the shirt out and pulled it over and head and looked down. The faceless head, hair, and hat of Tim graced my chest.

"Its a little too big on you, but its perfect. It looks great!"

"I think you're only saying that because i'm not wearing my jacket anymore." I laughed lightly and pulled the shirt back over my head. I only now realized that I stood in front of Tim in a thin red and white tank top that clung to my skin like glue. I quickly took my jacket from his hands and pulled it back over my head. I looked up and saw a smile playing on his lips.

"I think I should get going soon. I have an hour long Bart ride until I make it home."

Tim nodded, smiled, and walked with me to his front door. We entered the elevator and made our way down to the garage and got into the car.

As we drove in silence to the Bart station I became overly nervous and began to pick at my jeans. I thoroughly enjoyed his company, what if he was only being nice and didn't really want me to come to his game? Maybe he thought I was a crazy fan? Soon enough we were at the station and it was my time to go.

I turned to Tim and smiled sadly, "It was really nice meeting you. Thank you so much for your shirt." I opened the door and began to slide out of the way when I heard him talk.

"Wait! Wait a second! You're just going to leave like that?" He frowned, his eyebrows pulled and his lips pushed together.

"What do you mean?" I was confused.

"You're going to leave without giving me your number? No email address? Nothing?" I looked into his eyes and saw confusion.

"I didn't know you wanted to keep in contact? If you want my number and email i'll give it to you." I smiled softly and blushed.

"You're the first girl i've ever met that i've felt completely comfortable being around. I really enjoyed talking to you and yes, I do want your contact information." He grinned and pulled his cellphone from his pocket. "Whats your number?"

I gave him my number and email and pulled my phone out and received his contact information.

"Will you let me know when you made it to your destination? So I know that you're safe?"

"Of course, if that is what you would like." I can't believe this man was still concerned about my wellbeing! I opened the car door and stepped out into the sunlight and waved Tim off. I made my way to the train platform and was glad to see the train pull in and allow passengers to board.

I sat down and looked around at the practically empty train. I looked down at my phone and a smile swept across my face. Today was a perfect day. Not only did the Phillies win the game but I met a great guy who I am proud to say isn't a douchebag. I laid back on the seat and closed my eyes, a smile gracing my lips and thoughts from the day played on my mind.


	3. Chapter 3

"How are you feeling today, sweetie?" I smiled softly down at a little red-headed girl with bright green eyes. I was at work at the Pediatricians office and just seated a little seven year old girl who was extremely nervous. "Does your eyes hurt?" I looked down at her and smiled again before turning to her chart that I laid out on the counter top. I pulled a pen from my teal blue scrubs top and wrote the little girls weight, temperature, blood pressure, and her symptoms in her chart. I soon finished up my notes and began to talk to the little girls mother when I felt my phone vibrate in my pocket. I smiled and finished up the conversation before exiting the room and putting the chart on the door. I walked quickly to the lunch room and pulled my phone out of my pocket and smiled brightly. "Hey. I'd love to take you out to dinner tonight after you're done work. Let me know if you're up for it :)" My breathing picked up as I looked who texted me. Did Tim really just ask me out on a date? Maybe not. Friends can go out to eat too, I guess. I slid the unlock the screen and replied to the text message with, "Sure! What time?" I placed my phone back into my pocket and went back to work with a spring in my step. Tim texted me every morning on cue wishing me a good morning, and continued throughout the day and ended a text with 'Hope you sleep well!'

I raced home after work and jumped in the shower. I quickly washed my body and my hair before shaving. I jumped out of the shower once I was finished and blew dried by hair before starting on my makeup. As a simple girl I never put too much makeup on, so I put my black liquid eyeliner on my top lids and winged it at the ends. I added my mascara to my eyelashes and added my face powder before straightening my hair. I pulled my skinny jeans on and stood in front of my closet unsure about what type of top I should wear. I walked over to my bed and grabbed my phone. I opened my texts with Tim and asked him, "So, I'm not too sure about what to wear? What are you wearing?" I clicked my screen off and sighed. I went back to my closet and settled on a fancy pale pink shirt and a grey cardigan with a brown belt around my upper torso. I rushed over my phone as I heard it ding and saw Tim replied to my previous text message. "I'm wearing jeans and a grey v-neck shirt. I'm sure whatever you wear you will look beautiful :)" I grinned happily as I put my phone back on my bed before turning to my mirror to look at myself. I frowned, even though I knew I was dressed appropriately I still felt underdressed. What if Tim's fans saw us together? Sure, we were strictly friends but that didn't help the self-conscious feelings that overwhelmed me. I was no super model, I was just an ordinary girl with an ordinary job with an ordinary life. What if someone took a picture of me and posted it online? What would people say about me? I sighed. I know his fans would not agree with me, Tim deserved to be friends with girls like him- girls that had extremely white teeth, girls who looked like they belonged in a magazine. But here I am, the ordinary girl who gets countless amounts of text messages by the amazing pitcher.

I heard the doorbell ring an hour and a half later, and I rushed to open the door and blushed. There stood Tim smiling, bouncing slightly, which made me feel even more nervous about this dinner outing.

"You look gorgeous! Are you ready?" Tim smiled and held out his hand for me to take.

"Mhm! Let me go say bye to my mom first...i'll meet you in your car?" I smiled up at Tim, watched him nod, before retreating to his car. I shut the door behind me and went up to my moms room and told her that I was leaving, explaining to her that I was going to go out with a friend and that I would be back later. Even though me and my mother had a great relationship, better than most mother-daughters, my friendship with Tim was very low-key and not many people besides his team knew. After saying goodbye to my mom I rushed down the stairs and stood in front of the closed door and adjusted my top. I opened the door, stepped outside, and locked the door behind me. I walked to Tim's car and slid into it. I turned to him and smiled at him, he returned my smile and we pulled out of my driveway.

"Where do you want to go?" He looked over at me as we drove down the dark street.

"Hmm..i'm not really picky. What are you in the mood for?"

"Food! Are there any nice restaurants around here?" He looked over at me before turning back to the road.

"We do have Vic Stewarts around here but thats a little bit too fancy for me." I laughed softy and was glad when he joined in.

"Alright, thats fine. What are you in the mood for?"

"If I tell you I think you're just going to laugh at me," I said quietly and looked over at him.

"I promise that I won't laugh."

"Okay, well, I really want In-In-Out." I expected it after all, but it was still embarrassing when he laughed heartily at me.

"That I was not expecting. Okay, fast food it is." He looked over and winked, I think all the blood drained from my body. I cleared my throat and looked out the window, this was extremely nerve racking.

Soon enough we pulled into the In-In-Out drive-thru and ordered our food. Tim ordered a cheese burger, a fry, and a chocolate milk shake. Since I do not eat meat I ordered my usual- a grill cheese, fry, and a cup of water. I was a little confused as we pulled out of the parking lot and made our way back onto the main street.

I looked over at Tim and studied his face before asking, "Where are we going now?"

I watched a smile play across his lips before he answered, "Somewhere memorable." I raised my eyebrow at him and he flashed a smile at me before focusing back on the road.

"Memorable?" I was confused and hungry and was in need to find a bathroom after drinking some of my water. We merged onto the highway and sped into the darkness. Before long, roughly twenty minutes to be exact, my attention was drawn to us exiting the highway. I looked over at Tim and sighed, not only was our food cold by now but my bladder was about to explode. I shifted uncomfortably before turning back to Tim and sighing, "Are we almost there? I really need to use the bathroom.." I watched him grin and nod, "Yeah, just up here to the right. Look!" I looked to where Tim was pointing and gasped, I was shocked to see us pull into a drive-in movie theater.


	4. Chapter 4

I could feel Tim's eyes on me as I watched the movie, it made me somewhat nervous knowing that he was staring at me. How did I get so lucky? I met one of the nicest guys ever and was lucky enough to call him my friend. My good friend. I turned to him and smiled softly, raised my eyebrow, then turned back to the movie.

"Can I ask you a question?" Tim's soft voice filled the car. I turned to him and nodded and watched him turn the radio down that played the movie through the stereo.

"Why do you think we get along so well?" He asked, his hand coming up to below his bottom lip and stroked his small patch of facial hair.

"What do you mean?" I was a little confused, where did this come from?

"Why do you think we get along so well?" He asked again and dropped his hand back onto his leg.

"I guess its because..well..i'm assuming its because theres somewhat of an attraction? I don't know. Wait..not an attraction as if 'I want to date you' but more of 'We have things in common and mesh well together.' I don't know. I really don't. It just feels normal- right, I guess. It just feels right." I stammered a few times, I was so unsure about what I was saying. I cleared my throat nervously and looked away.

"Yeah, Yeah I guess you're right." He nodded in agreement and ran a hand through his hair then pushed some hair behind his right ear. Tim stared at me for a few seconds before turning back to the screen and turning the stereo back up. I continued to look at the side of his face before turning back to the screen.

Before I knew it the movie was over and we were pulling out of the lot and back onto the dark road, quickly driving down the street in search of the freeway. No one spoke until we made our way onto the freeway, the tension was high and I was nervous. I wasn't sure why I was nervous, but i'm assuming it was from his question regarding our friendship. I cleared my throat, stared at the road in front of us and spoke quietly, "Why did you ask me that question?" I saw him turn his head towards me and looked back at the road. He didn't answer for a few minutes, and the car remained quiet as we sped down the freeway.

Tim finally spoke after a few minutes of silence, his voice filling the car and making me tremble on the inside. "I don't know. I just don't have this type of friendship with everyone, its different. Don't get me wrong, I like it- I really do. Its nice to hang out with someone- a female- who doesn't care about my status quo, my money, and doesn't ask questions regarding anything important. You're right, we do have some sort of attraction. But I don't think the attraction lays only inside the friend zone that you were talking about. Well, not with me anyway." My eyes widened from what I was hearing and a brush crept upon my cheeks. I was not expecting this, not at all. I bowed my head in embarrassment unsure about what to say. I wish this ride back to my house was almost over- I don't know what to say and it was awkwardly uncomfortable. Since I didn't know how to respond I didn't say anything, I just kept my head down and watching my finger nails scratch my jeans.

I could hear Tim sign, run his hand through his hair, then spoke again, "I'm sorry, I didn't mean to embarrass you. This whole thing is a little weird for me."

I looked up quickly at him, staring at him intently, carefully choosing my words before speaking. "It's fine, I guess." I looked away and stared at the passing buildings that glowed in the night. "I just didn't expect you to say that." I lived in a fairytale most of the time and I always knew that I had a little crush on Tim, but the thing is I never thought of him ever having feelings for me back. I didn't know how to handle this. I didn't want this.

"Yeah..I didn't think i'd say that either. So its a surprising to the both of us." He spoke ever so quietly, I knew that he felt a little awkward and uncertain about what he said. I watched him stare at the road in front of us, light reflecting on his face as cars passed us, his top teeth biting down on his lower lip. He looked so innocent- his face was relaxed, his eyes shining in the light of the passing cars, his laugh lines that shown whenever he smiled, his little patch of hair under his bottom lip, and those lips that were being chewed on by his perfect teeth.

I breathed in deeply, exhaled and spoke, "Tim, I really appreciate you telling me this. I really do, but to be honest I don't think I could ever date you. You're such a good person, possibly too good for me. I just don't think I could ever deal with the life you live. The road trips, constantly being approached by fans, the rumors, us living an hour away from each other- everything. It would be too much, were too busy to settle down with each other. I'm sorry, we need to be just friends." I felt incredibly sad telling him how I felt, it wasn't like me to purposely set out and hurt someones feelings. It was true, though. We couldn't be together, we could only be friends.

"Thats fine, don't worry. I understand completely." I watched him nod his head, not daring to look at me but instead focusing on the freeway.

I was thankful to see my development come into view in the dark. The car ride back to my place was too quiet and awkward- neither one of us spoke after I rambled on about how we could only be friends. We soon pulled into my driveway and once again I began to tremble on the inside. What do you say to someone who you just hurt?

I unbuckled my seatbelt and turned in the seat to look at him, examining the side of his face as he refused to look at me.

"Thanks Timmy, for tonight. I really enjoyed the movie." I said softly as I continued to stare at him. I watched him bow his head and look down at his lap, his hands sprawled out on his legs that began to bob up and down.

"No problem, i'm glad you enjoyed tonight." I could barely understand him as he spoke, his voice sounded so hurt. I reached over and stroked his cheek with my hand, even though I just told him we were just friends I still felt incredibly sad about everything. He is my friend and seeing him so upset broke my heart.

He never looked at me as I stroked his cheek so I dropped my hand back into my lap. "I'm sorry Timmy, please look at me." I begged and reached out to reach his arm, hoping that he would look at me and tell me that it was okay. Instead he moved his left hand to unlock the doors- a clear sign that he wanted me to get out of the car. I sat there for a few seconds before sighing, picking up my purse, and getting out of the car. I walked up to my door and turned around to look at him, he was staring back but turned his engine on and pulled out of my driveway and sped into the night. I turned back to my front door, opened it and slipped inside.


	5. Chapter 5

"What did I do wrong? Why are you so mad at me?" I cried in my hands, my shoulders shaking with emphasis. "I'm sorry! I'm sorry!" I whispered as I continued to cry. My whole life was crashing around me. I pulled my hands away from my face and looked up at Tim, sniffling, and pushed away the falling tears from my eyes.

"Please don't hate me!" I groaned and reached for his hand, and was devastated as he pulled his hand away from me. I looked down at his feet as more tears forced their way out of my eyes.

"How do you expect me to trust you?" Tim snapped, pushing his hair away from his face angrily. I looked back up to his face and was shocked to see the anger on his face, his eyes no longer bright and happy but instead were dark green. "How are you crying when you're the one that hurt ME?"

"I didn't mean to! I'm so sorry!" I sobbed again in my awaiting hands, I could feel my keels becoming weak and I was in fear that I would fall to them.

"You're such a waste of time, this whole thing was a waste. I don't ever want to talk to you again." I heard Tim snarl angrily, "Have a great life" before walking away.

I dropped to my knees and cried even harder. How could he hate me? How did I hurt him so bad?

I could feel myself losing my grip with my thoughts as I heard a neighbors dog bark. I sat straight up in bed, gasping for breath and felt as if someone punched me in my heart. I reached up to my cheeks and pushed away the tears that I cried from my horrible dream. I rubbed them away and pulled my glasses onto my face then back laid back down and stared up at my ceiling. I studied the grooves in the white ceiling and wondered why I had that dream. "I didn't do anything wrong," I whispered to myself as I thought of the night before's events. I rolled onto my left side and pulled the covers up to my chin hoping that I would go back to sleep. I closed my eyes after taking off my glasses but instead of going back into the darkness I found myself becoming irritated at how bright it was inside my room. I sighed and sat up in bed, pushing my hair out of my face, I once again put my glasses back on. I looked at my phone which sat on my nightstand and grabbed it, hoping to see that I received a text message from Tim. I was discouraged when I saw that the only text I received was from my cousin asking me if I could send her baby pictures of us for some scrapbook she was putting together. Tim always texted me in the morning- always. I clicked the green icon that took me to my messages and clicked on my text message with Tim. If he wasn't going to send me a morning text then I would send him one, I thought to myself as I began to type a short but sweet message.

'Good morning Timmy. Any plans for this lovely day?' I stared at the message before pushing the send button. Was this a decent message to send him? After all he had to still be upset over last night if he didn't send me the traditional message I was so used to getting. I grew the balls I was never born with and pushed send and waited for his response. I waited, and waited, and waited, and realized that he wasn't going to text me back as I sat waiting for twenty minutes for his response.

I pulled myself out of bed and walked over to the bathroom where I peed and then proceeded to brush my teeth. Morning breath always grossed me out. After brushing my teeth I looked at my reflection in the mirror and was appalled at my appearance. My hair looked as if I had my head out of a fast moving vehicle like a dog, my eyes had dark bags under them, and my cheeks were puffy. I grimaced at my appearance and decided that I had to take a shower before presenting myself to the world. I turned the shower on and began to strip out of my clothes. I pushed off my grey shorts, underwear, and pulled off my white T-shirt. I stood in front of the fogged mirror and stared at my slender body. I wasn't anything spectacular- size D boobs that to me seemed small, normal sized butt, a waist that could be smaller than it was, long hair that reached to my lower back, and hips that people said were considered birthing hips- whatever that meant. I didn't see why anyone would find me attractive, especially Tim for that matter. I leaned into the mirror and looked at my face- it was clear, no zits or pimples, proportionate nose, neatly trimmed eyebrows, and green almond shaped eyes. I was never the first girl guys would pick to go on a date with, and I was usually the rebound girl that guys would never want to date once they moved on from their broken relationship. I watched my image slowly fade away as the mirrors completely fogged up- my cue to get into the shower and wash away the feelings of hopelessness. I turned the shower off once I finished my shower routine and pulled on my fluffy green towel and stepped out of the shower and onto the cream colored rug in the bathroom. I flexed my toes and gripped the rug before drying myself off.

I couldn't shake off the fact that Tim was avoiding me, or the fact that I probably ruined our friendship completely. I marched into my bedroom and picked up my phone in hopes to see a response. No response.

"Well, thats that then. If he's going to ignore me then i'm going to find him and make him talk to me." I said loudly and threw my phone onto my bed and proceeded to pull on a light flowery dress. I began my makeup and blew dried my hair and straightened it. I waked over to my closet and pulled out my cowboy boots- my favorite boots to wear. I looked in the mirror at my completed image and was satisfied at how I looked.

I sang along to music and sped down the freeway to my destination. "If you could only see the beast you've made of me, I held it in but now it seems you've set it running free, The saints can't help me now, the ropes have been unbound, I hunt for you with bloody feet across the hallow'd ground." I sang at the top of my lungs with Florence and the Machine as I sped through the tunnels that was lined with orange lights. I soon found myself crossing the Bay Bridge and was appalled at the skyline. It was extremely overcast and looked freezing, it was amazing how the weather was so different an hour away from where I lived. I bit my lip and rolled down my window to test the weather and was met with freezing cold. I groaned a bit and rolled my window up and mentally cursed myself for not checking the forecast before setting off on my quest to find Tim. I drove aimlessly around the San Francisco streets before finding the apartment complex that I was looking for and pulled into the parking garage. I pulled into an empty spot and searched my SUV for the tag to prove that I am allowed in the building. I opened the glove compartment and watched all the paperwork fall out and onto the ground. I sighed and began to pick the papers up and shove them back in, but not before setting aside the tag. I put the tag on my rearview mirror, grabbed my purse, and retreated from my warm car and into the cold garage. I shivered and began to walk to the elevator that I became so use to. I pushed the up arrow and rushed inside the opening elevator doors to escape the freezing temperature. I anxiously pushed the code on the black buttons and the elevator began to lift off the ground and disappear into the sky.


	6. Chapter 6

I pushed open door to the apartment I became to familiar to and was greeted with excited barks from the two cutest dogs i've ever seen in my life. It never failed to amaze me how much I loved these dogs, and was extremely attached to Tim's new puppy Kayo. I kneeled down to pet the excited dogs and smiled as they barked and jumped around.

"Do you have to go potty?" Tim hated when I said the word 'potty' to his dogs because he didn't want them to become accustomed to the word since he always asked if they wanted to go 'out.' I watched the white and black dog run down the long hallway that ended with a sliding glass door that led to a little court yard. I followed them down the hallway and let them out and watched them sniff around their little area. It was a sweet little courtyard, to the left of the sliding doors was a patio set, flowers lined the walls and were planted in the bright green grass. It wasn't anything spectacular but it was still cute.

I walked back inside the condo and headed straight to Tim's room to see if he left any indication to where he was for the day. The room was a cream color that I begged him to paint differently, a king bed sat directly in the middle of the room that was covered with a black satan quilt, seamless windows made up the other side of the room and the floor was covered with cherry wood hardwood. In front of the bed was the master bathroom which was probably six times the size of my bedroom at home and the master closet was at the end of the bathroom and to the right. The closet was extremely impressive- Tim hired people to come in and install shelving that took up the entire room. It was a woman's dream closet, to be exact, but the only clothes and shoes that were placed in here were for men. For a guy Tim sure did have a lot of clothes and shoes- I could lose count of how many t-shirts he had and the wide range of colors they were, he had a section for his formal wear that included tuxes and suits, his workout clothes were made up of track pants and wife beaters, and he had an area dedicated to his sleepwear. Large racks held his massive collection of shoes that ranged from tennis shoes to his formal shoes. If he brought any woman to live with them I was positive that she would keel over by the lack of space she would have in the closet since Tim took up so much room. But I didn't foresee that in the future anytime soon.

I searched his room for any clues of where he was but came up empty handed. I walked out of the bedroom and walked to the kitchen and tried searching there for some sort of sign. I sighed a sigh of defeat after a few minutes of no clues and decided that I would have to go to the baseball park to see if he was there practicing. "He is a baseball player after all." I spoke quietly to myself as I walked down the hallway to let the dogs back inside. "He's probably just practicing and having a good time. But why would he not answer my phone call? He usually does." I bit my bottom lip as I pondered if he was really mad at me. The doors ran circle around my ankles as I made my way back to the front door where I said goodbye to them, softly touching their faces, before leaving.

I drove around the city in search of the place I knew Tim spent most of his free time at: AT&T Park. I pulled into the special parking lot, that was for family and friends, after flashing my parking permit. I tried to get as close to the field as I could and spotted the white Porsche that I knew to be Tim's. I slid out of my car and into the freezing cold where I instantly felt goosebumps cover my skin. I wrapped my arms around myself as I walked to the stadium and hoped that Tim wouldn't be too mad at me for showing up at his practice. It seemed like it took a lifetime but I finally made it inside the stadium and followed the path I knew took me to the field. As I saw the green grass come closer to me as I walked towards it I began to panic, "What if he gets upset that i'm here? Will he even talk to me?" I whispered to myself as I finally reached the seats and began to make my way up the isle until I stood against the barrier next to the field. I watched Matt Cain, Brian Wilson, and Tim throwing balls around and talk between themselves. Something caught Tim's interest and he laughed loudly and threw his head back, his hair flying in the breeze and his eyes sparkling as he looked to Brian who spoke next. I stood there for a few minutes until Matt turned and looked at me, turned to Tim and said something before nodding my way. I saw Tim turn and look at me in confusion before jogging over to me. My body was frozen in place, but I wasn't sure if it was because I was nervous to talk to Tim or because it was freezing outside. My dress and hair blew in the wind, but at this point I didn't care- all I cared about was wishing my arms that were wrapped around my chest would somehow produce enough heat to warm me up. Before I knew it Tim stood in front of me with his brows pulled together and his lips pushed together in a straight line. I coughed nervously and smiled sheepishly at him.

"You didn't answer my phone calls and texts..I needed to talk to you. I was afraid you were mad at me." I looked up into his eyes and bit my lip out of habit.

Tim sighed and pushed his hair behind his ear, "I'm not mad at you. My phone is in my bag in the dugout, I didn't hear it ring or I would have picked up." He smiled slightly and I felt as if all the weight in the world washed off my shoulders. I breathed a sigh of relief and smiled brightly at him. He raised his eyebrow at me and looked me up and down, "And what are you wearing? You must be freezing your ass off!"

"I am! I'm pretty sure i'm about to develop hypothermia! It wasn't cold by my house!" I felt my teeth begin to chatter and watched my breath as I talked.

"Jesus Christ woman, look at the forecast next time you come to the city." He laughed lightly at me. "Your lips are starting to turn blue, here, grab my shoulders, i'm going to bring you into the clubhouse and get you some clothes."

I did what I was told and grabbed onto his shoulders and felt his arms wrap around my waist. He lifted me over the barrier and placed me onto the field. He wrapped his warm arm around me and walked me toward the dugout.

"HEY GIRL!" Brian laughed at me, "NICE PANTIES!" I turned toward him and glared as I wrapped my hand behind my back to keep my dress from flying up again. I saw the corner of my eye that Tim turned and looked at Brian, which made Brian stop laughing and continue throwing balls around. We made it into the dugout and I could feel the warmth coming from inside the clubhouse. I was ecstatic when we finally made it to the changing room where I took a seat in Tim's black desk chair and sighed a sigh of relief when the warmth took over my skin.

"I'll be right back, i'm going to find you some actual clothes to wear, okay?" He pushed my wind-blown hair back from my face and smiled as I looked up at him. His beautiful green eyes sparkled into mine as I pushed his hand away from my crazy hair. I watched him turn and walk into another room, which is when I closed my eyes and leaned back into the chair.

"I leave for ten minutes and you fall asleep? Jesus, women can sleep anywhere." I heard Tim laugh at me. I opened my eyes and frowned at him, "You have no idea the shit I went through to find you today." I said sarcastically and closed my eyes again.

"Yeah? And what did you do to find me? You should always know i'm here." I heard him pull up a chair and sit down.

Keeping my eyes closed I replied, "I went to your place to see if you were there. You weren't obviously, but I did let the dogs out. They were excited to see me, I think they like me more than you." I grinned and Tim slapped my thigh which made me open my eyes and sit forward.

"Lincecum, haven't you heard boys aren't supposed to hit girls?" I said as I swapped him back on the leg. Tim lunged at me which made me scream and jump up and run around as Tim began to chase me. "Your mom taught you better than to chase girls!" I screamed and laughed as I tried to dodge him. "My dad taught me to get even though!" He laughed back and chased me down the hallway that led to the stadium. I felt his strong arms wrap around my waist and pull me to his chest. I felt his warm breath by my ear which made me squirm around in his arms until I was facing him. I watched his face as it seemed so angelic; his long hair was straggly from sweat, his bright green eyes that shone down upon me, his strong nose and his lips that were smiling. I watched nervously as his head dipped towards me and his lips planted themselves against my forehead. He let go of my waist and walked over towards the clothes he brought me, "Here's a shirt, of course its a shirt of me, hoodie, and sweats. I don't have any shoes though so your sandals will have to do." He threw me the clothes at me and waved me off into the bathroom to change.

"I swear, Timmy, you're so pushy sometimes." I grumbled as I walked into the bathroom and locked the door behind me. When I emerged from the bathroom Tim was gone so I stuffed my dress into his cubby and headed out to the dugout to watch him and the boys practice. I took a seat on the bench and watch Tim throw a fast ball at Stewart. He looked so happy laughing and joking with the guys, and this made me happy to know that he was content with his life. I stared at him with a smile on my face and wrapped my feet under my thighs. Tim turned and looked at me and smiled softly before throwing another ball. This is where I belonged- here with Tim.


	7. Chapter 7

I didn't realize I fell asleep until I felt pellets hit me in the face which stung. "What the..?" I sat up sleepily and covered my face as something else hit me in the face, "That hurts! What are you hitting me with? And why are you aiming for my face?" I pulled my arms over my head to cover my face and I heard the guys laugh at my childish whine.

"Who said you can fall asleep in the presence of amazing pitchers and catchers? Would you fall asleep in the presence of God?" I heard Brian laugh as he continued to pelt me with sunflower seeds.

"Timmy, please put the dog on his leash because he's becoming a nuisance." I mumbled as I laid back onto the bench, turning towards the wall to make sure my face wouldn't be abused any longer. I heard them laugh again, "I'd totally piss on you if I was a dog!" Brian injected again which caused another stifle of laughter from the boys.

I sat up and gave Brian a dirty look, "Really? Because if you did i'd take your ass straight to the vet to get your balls chopped off." I looked over at Tim who was grinning happily, his hair blowing in the wind and his eye sparkling. "And Lincecum, i'd get your balls chopped off too for being his accomplice," I snapped at Tim who raised his eyebrow in surprise. The boys 'OOOH'ed and continued laughing. Tim jogged over to me and patted my head, "You took a nice long nap." He smiled down at my annoyed face and sat beside me. Brian looked over at us, "Yeah, maybe the baby should go back to sleep because she seems a bit grumpy."

"Grumpy? I think I have every reason to be grumpy because some dick was throwing sunflower seeds at my face! Those things felt like I was getting hit by BBs by how fast and hard you were throwing them!" I said sarcastically as I looked at Brian who grinned and began talking to Stewart.

Tim patted my leg to calm me down and wrapped his arm around my shoulder, "Are you hungry? I need to get some food before the game tonight."

"Yeah, i'm hungry. But I need to get go buy clothes first." I said as I pulled at the baggy black sweat pants that had Giants written in gold down the side of my leg.

"What? Why? These clothes look awesome on you." He grinned as he looked at the ridiculous outfit I had on.

"Really? I look like a total fan girl right now wearing all this Giants gear. No, I need to stop and pick up something to wear. This won't do." I rolled my eyes at him and leaned my head against his shoulder and spoke softy, "But thank you very much for finding this wardrobe for me."

He nodded his head, "No problem, thats the perks of being on the team- I can get apparel for free. I do like this on you, its nice to see you in black and orange rather than red and white." He chuckled as I took in a ragged breath and pulled away from him.

"I swear to you Timothy, you mock my love for the Phillies one more time and i'll make sure I wear a Cliff Lee shirt to the next Giants vs. Phillies game." I stood up, planted my hands on my hips, and glared down to him. A sheepish smile played across his face as he looked up at me, "So you're telling me you planned on wearing a Giants shirt to the next game we play against the Phillies?"

"What? Wait, no. I didn't mean it like that, of course i'm supporting my boys!"

"WE are your boys. Not them, they are just a team who you don't even know." Tim stood up and grabbed my waist and pulled me to his chest. "I'll bet you're going to wear the shirt with my face on it." He smiled down at my and pushed my hair from my face, stroking my cheek then placing his hands on my shoulders.

"No, I don't think i'll be wearing that shirt. Highly doubt that will ever happen." I glared up at him, pulled myself from his arms and began to walk towards the clubhouse. "Are you coming? I need clothes and you need food."

"Alright, alright. Hold up, let me get my stuff." Tim turned and picked up his belongings before following me into the clubhouse. I walked over the Tim's cubby and grabbed my dress and purse and waited for him as he showered quickly and dressed. It didn't take him long at all to get ready and before I knew it he was lacing up his sneakers.

"Where do you want to go shopping?" Tim looked up at my quickly then back down as he continued his to tie his sneakers.

"Either Forever21 or Urban Outfitters, whichever is closer. I don't really care. Where should I meet you at for food?"

He looked up at me in surprised and furrowed his eyebrows, "What do you mean? Aren't I coming with you?" He finished tying his shoes and stood up and pulled his hat on backwards.

"Well, I assumed you wanted to go back to your place to get ready?" I raised my eyebrow at him as I looked up into his green eyes.

"Savannah, I just showered and changed. Why the hell would I have to go back home to get ready again? I'm not a chick, I don't need to change my outfit ten times."

I looked at him in surprise, "What? What did I say? I'm sorry, not ALL girls change their outfit ten times. Just most of them." He apologized, i'm assuming he didn't know what I was surprised.

"What?" He asked again and took a step back from me.

"You never call me by Savannah. Actually, you never formally address me..you just usually talk to me."

"Really?" He looked up at the ceiling and thought, "Yeah, I guess you're right. I like your name, Savannah, i'm sorry for not calling you by it more." I nodded my head and smiled at him.

"Alrighty then, Timothy. Lets get going, we can be here all day talking about nothing." I walked towards the exit and waited for Tim to follow.

"Who's car are we taking?" We exited the stadium and freezing air hit me like a ton of bricks, I shivered and wrapped my arms around me and was thankful with Tim developed me in a hug to warm me up.

"Why are we taking one car?" I asked into Tim's chest, my head bowed and my forehead laid against his chest.

"Probably because were going to eat then come back here for the game?" He spoked in my ear with a small laugh, his hair brushing against the top of my head and his arms tightening around me.

"I didn't realize I was going to the game tonight?" I breathed in Tim's manly smell and looked up at him.

"Of course you are. Do you think you'd get out of supporting us?" He grinned and we walked towards his car and opened the door for me.

"Maybe i'll buy a red shirt and wear it tonight!" I laughed and looked over to Tim who raised his eyebrows, "I don't think so. The only colors you'll be wearing are black and orange. Now get in the car before you turn into a popsicle." He gently pushed me into the car and closed the door behind me. I loved this car, it smelled of not only leather but of Tim's smell. It smelled like home.


	8. Chapter 8

"Just friends, were just friends." I kept telling myself over and over again as I searched the sale racks at Forever 21 in hopes to buy a cheap jacket to wear tonight to the game. "We could never date, we live in two different worlds." I pushed two jackets aside and was glad to find a navy zip up, now I had to find a cheap shirt, jeans, and sneaks to wear so I don't freeze later on. I looked over at Tim who was pushing aside hangers full of shirts. He didn't complain at all helping me shop for something to wear, and he actually was keeping himself occupied by singing Hall and Oates under his breath. I crossed the store to him and smiled to myself as I heard him sing quietly, "Oh here she comes, watch out boy she'll chew you up, oh here she comes, she's a maneater."

"Not only are you helping me shop but you're also preforming a concert for me in the store? I feel extremely privileged." I grinned and poked him gently in the side and giggled as he grabbed for my arms. I pulled away and laughed and smiled at him, "Did you find anything that I should buy?" I pushed my hair from my face and tilted my head as he held up a satin leopard tunic and a sequined scoop tunic. I cleared my throat and raised my eyebrows at the choice of shirts, "Seriously? You want me to buy these? To wear to a game?" I lightly touched the bronze sequined scoop tunic and examined it before looking back at Tim who smiled.

"Hey now, these are really nice shirts. And what the fuck is a tunic?" He looked down at the tops before looking at me and handing me the shirts. "Wear either one, i'll buy them. You need black jeans with these. And you need to wear a black hoodie with this shirt if you're wearing it. Navy won't match." Tim pulled the navy zip up from me and hung it back on the rack before turning to look around the store to see if he could find a black hoodie. I sighed as I made my wear to the area with the jeans and picked up a black pair of size 6 jeans. I looked around to see Tim looking at boots, picking them up and examining them before putting them back down. He picked up a pair of brownish tan boots and looked them over before throwing them over his shoulder, one boot hanging off his back and the other on his chest. He turned to me and raised his eyebrow, a slight smile playing across his face. He gracefully pushed his hair from his face before turning and looking for jackets.

"Is this all for today?" The red head teen smiled at me as she rang up my items nervously as she kept looking quickly at Tim. Unfazed by the flirtatious smiles Tim handed over his credit card and punched in his pin code. "Is this your girlfriend? She's beautiful." The girl looked my way and nodded, smiled, and grinned back to Tim. My eyes widened in surprised and I laughed a bit, I looked over at Tim who looked down at me in surprised. "Nah, just my really good friend. She is beautiful, isn't she?" He smiled softly down at me before rustling my hair. "Thank you sweetie, have a good day, okay?" He smiled at the teenager before ushering me out the doors and wrapped his arm lazily around my shoulder.

"How awkward," I laughed nervously as we made our way towards the mall entrance.

"Seriously, I can't go anywhere without being asked if the girl i'm with is my significant other. Sorry, I hope that wasn't too embarrassing for you." I watched Tim's head bow down to look at me but I ignored his stare and continued staring straight ahead.

"Do you want to change in the bathroom before we go to lunch?"

"Mmm, yeah, I probably should. It wouldn't be classy of me to change inside of a restaurant." I said as I eyed the bathroom area and pulled away from Tim's arm and began to walk in the direction of the female side. "You should probably wait in the car so you don't get bombarded by fans." I smiled and watched him nod in agreement, "Yeah, you're probably right. Okay, don't take too long because i'm really hungry." I watched him walk towards the towards, turn and smile at me, then walk outside in search of his car.

"What would you like, Dearie?" The little old waitress asked me as she stood next to me waiting to take my order. "I guess i'll just have the cheese pizza." I replied as I looked up at the waitress and smiled at her as I handed my menu to her. "And yourself, sweetie?" She asked Tim who scanned the menu once more before replying, "I'll take the burger with a side of fries, please." Tim handed his menu to the waitress, "Cheese and onions?" Tim nodded his head and watched the waitress walk to the back of the restaurant.

"Timmy, I think we need to talk." I placed my hands on my lap under the table and nervously looked up at Tim who raised his eyebrow.

"Sure, what do you want to talk about?" I watched him lean forward and place his palms on the table.

"What is going on with us? I'm a little confused. I guess its my fault that this is confusing since last night I told you we were just friends." I ran my hand across my forehead and sighed.

"I have no idea, I was wondering the same thing. What do you want?" Tim turned his head to the side and smiled at me which made me want to die on the inside.

I stared at him and examined his face, his soft smile, his laugh lines before responding, "Your lifestyle scares me, to be honest. I'm not good enough for you. Not pretty enough, not skinny enough, not rich enough. I would be lying if I told you that I didn't have feelings for you, but I know that we just wouldn't be able to be together."

"I think you're perfect for me. My lifestyle? I may play baseball but you know that I spend all my free time at my place. I don't go out- I don't club and I rarely adventure outside my comfort zone. And how can you say you're not pretty enough? You're beautiful, every time I see you I get butterflies in my stomach because you make me so nervous. Also, I think your body is perfect so please don't feel self conscious. You are the most beautiful girl i've ever seen." Tim reached out and motioned for me to put my hands on the table, which I did, and my cheeks burned red when he placed his hand on mine and interlocked his fingers with mine.

I couldn't speak. My voice was gone and my insides trembled. This felt like it was straight out of a movie. Did the man of my dreams really just tell me he cares for me?


	9. Chapter 9

My heart skipped a beat as I watched Tim walk onto the baseball field. He looked so confident as he took his spot on the mound and mentally prepared himself for a tough and rigorous game that was in store for him and his teammates. I sat alone at the stadium but never once did I feel alone, I knew that my friend who cared for me so deeply was within reach and that comforted me. I scanned the crowed and smiled as I took in all the fans who I once disliked. How quickly time has passed since I last sat in the stadium supporting my boys- the Phillies- and screamed my lungs out as they won the game. That was such a spectacular day. Not only did my boys win, but I was scared for my life of getting the crap beat out of me, and I literally ran into Tim and hurt myself as I fell to the hard floor and made a fool of myself. The memories of that day flooded my memory and I found myself lost in past memories.

"What do you mean, you want me to try a some of your ice cream?" I asked suspiciously as Tim pushed his ice cream cone into my face for me to taste.

"World Class Chocolate is the best flavor here at Baskin Robbins, I promise that it will be so good." His eyes were soft as he encouraged me to take a taste of his ice cream. Our eyes locked and I tried to read his green eyes before going in to take a lick of the ice cream. Before I knew it Tim pushed the whole cone into my face and smeared it across my cheek, a loud laugh plunging from his throat and a snarl escaping from mine.

"You're such an asshole. For fuck's sake Tim! Seriously! Was that necessary?" I snapped angrily and grabbed the white napkin and wiped my face of the ice cream. His chuckles quickly faded as I grabbed the ball of ice cream off my cone and smashed it into his face. "Karma is such a bitch." I smiled as Tim glared at me.

"For fuck's sake, Savannah. Seriously? Was that necessary?" He said in a high pitched voice as he mocked me, resulting in me playfully slapping his arm.

I was soon disrupted from my thoughts as screams of joy filled the stadium. I looked around quickly to see what the commotion and realized that Tim struck out the second player. My heart picked up its pace as I leaned forward on the seat in anticipation. I watched Tim's body as he threw his curve ball. He really had his mechanics down pat- his body a work of fine art that was created with such care. His victim swung his bat and the ball went soaring in the air- I watched as Tim turned around and watched as the ball fell from the air and straight into Belt's glove. I jumped out of the seat with the other fans and cheered. I wasn't cheering for the Giant's, I was cheering for Tim who seemed flawless on the mound. Before I knew it the ninth inning approached and I bit my lip anxiously as I watched Brian throw a fast ball towards the player. Ball. I sighed and mentally cursed Brian. He threw another pitch which ended up in a ball. Brian then threw a pitch and striked out the player and won the game. The crowd went crazy and Brian did his signature move and walked off the mound and gave his teammates a high five.

I pushed my way past the slow moving crowd and tried to make my way to the special elevator to no avail. I huffed and puffed as I slid in and out of fans and eventually made my way to my destination a half hour after the game ended. I pulled a pass out of my purse and scanned it under the scanner and the doors to the elevator opened up. I quickly pushed the close doors button and pushed the G button. The doors opened up and I walked towards the clubhouse that I became to familiar to. The smell of sweaty men dominated the rooms after a game and I watched as reporters scrunched up their faces as they tried to get use to the smell. I slipped past the doors and into the main room that was filled with reporters and the team who answered all the questions that were thrown at them.

"If you could do one thing differently tonight, what would you have done?" One woman asked Brian who thought for a second before answering, "I would have ate mexican food before the game. Mexican food is a delicacy in its own right- you can't go wrong with a big giant meaty burrito stuffed with sour cream and all sorts of amazingness. Believe me when I say this, but salsa and chips is one of the best creations on this planet." I rolled my eyes at another ridiculous answer that slipped out of Brian's mouth who continued to talk, "Margaritas? Yeah, can't go wrong with them when eating Mexican food. Coronas? Another big thing that goes with Mexican food. Mexicans know this and get it, but drinking an alcoholic drink is a must when connecting with our amigos over a burrito." I shook my head and made my way to the reporters who surrounded Tim and asked him questions about his pitching. I sat down in an empty chair and waited patiently until all the reporters cleared out of the room.

"Congrats on the game!" I smiled as I walked up to Tim, who raised his eyebrow as he looked down at me, "Thanks, Savannah. Are you ready to start wearing orange and black yet?" I laughed at him and watched as he unbuttoned his jersey and shrugged it off, hung it on the hanger in the cubby, and pulled his black shirt over his head. He stood in front of me shirtless and pulled a towel out of the cubby. "I need to shower before we leave, can you wait a few minutes?" He looked down at me and rustled my hair as I nodded and watched him retreat to the showers.


	10. Chapter 10

I tapped my foot impatiently on the cement floor as I waited for Tim to come from the showers. I couldn't help but watch some of the guys play dominos on the small card table, shouting in delight and cracking dumb jokes that I clearly didn't understand. When a game ended wasn't the team supposed to go home? Guess not if Cain, Huff, and Torres willingly stayed behind to play some games together. I put my elbows on my knees and cupped my chin with my hands, clearly very bored of spending my free time here. Today was the longest day i've had in awhile and all I really wanted to do was go home and pass out in my bed. I've experienced too many emotions today that I probably shouldn't have- but I don't regret it now. Everything happens for a reason, right? I guess thats what people say, but if its true i'm not too sure. I'm not some sappy girl looking for my true love, my soul mate, the love of my life. I'm not even sure if that stuff even exists anymore. Times have changed as well as our outlook on life. People marry the ones who they imagine themselves growing old with, but that love is usually short lived and then they get divorced and become bitter people about finding another romance. I once thought I found the love of my life. Sure, I was only twenty at the time but that didn't mean my feelings were any less real than a couple who have been married for thirty years. I honestly thought that he was the one I was going to spend the rest of my life with, my soul mate, my partner in crime. I can remember his eyes like I just saw them- sparkling hazel eyes with a hint of yellow around the center. His eyes always shined when he smiled, his laugh always met his eyes and he smiled at almost everything. Things are different now, and unfortunately we are no longer together but the memories I have of Jake seem like yesterday.

"Savannah? Hey, are you in there?" I was broke from my trance, my thoughts dissipating as I was forced back into reality. I blinked my eyes a few times to focus them before looking up at Tim who was smiling down at me. "You looked like you were in some deep abyss."

I nodded slowly, "I felt like I was." I smiled back at him and stood up. "Took you long enough. And you said girls take forever to get ready, as if buddy."

"Sorry, I didn't mean to take that long. Its the hair- it takes awhile to dry." Tim pointed to his hair and grinned.

"Now you really sound like a chick." I laughed at his shocked expression and picked my purse and hiked it over my shoulder. "Are you ready yet? I want to blow this popsicle stand." I turned away from him as he chuckled and made my way to the doors, looking over my shoulder and waiting for him. "Hurry up, Lincecum," I said impatiently as he took his jolly old time collecting his bag.

"Have somewhere to go? Why are you in such a rush?" Tim said as he walked up next to me. I watched as he looked over his shoulder and said goodbye to his teammates before pushing me into the hallway. "Seriously, why are you so tense?"

I shrugged my shoulders, "It's been a long day, I kindof want to get home soon." I looked over at him and frowned. He continued to stare straight ahead of him and refused to look down at me.

We continued walking down the hallway and made our way outside where Tim's car was parked. We walked in silence which made me uncomfortable. I was relieved to finally get inside his car, but was once again met with silence when I asked if anything was wrong.

"No, nothing is wrong. I just didn't think you wanted to go home right away. I've enjoyed my time with you..you know? It's been a good day and I just don't want it to end yet." His soft voice filled the car as we drove through parking lots in search of my car. "Can't you spend the night? I have an extra room. We can eat ice cream and watch TV or something." His voice cracked as he spoke, his nervousness apparent and my awkwardness visible.

I cleared my throat in hopes I wouldn't get a lump in my throat. "Thats a little fast for me..to be honest."

"I don't mean. I don't mean that you sleeping over would mean that we would sleep together. Just hang out. No sexual stuff." He pushed his hair nervously behind his ear before gripping the steering wheel. Thankfully my car came in view and I secretly hoped that this conversation would end.

"Yeah, I don't know Tim. I think it would be best for me to go home." I spoke softly and looked up at him as he put the car in park next to mine. He nodded his head slowly and picked at his jeans. This whole conversation was making my anxiety terrible. "I'll see you later, okay?" I smiled, leaned over, and pushed his hair behind his ear. "One day you'll have to let me know what kind of conditioner you use. Your hair is beautiful." I watched his cheeks turn red and a shy smile play across his lips, his head bowed towards his lap and his fingers drumming against his knee. I smiled once more before getting out of the car, digging for my keys and walking over to the driver side of the car. I snapped my head up as I heard Tim's car door open and watched him walk over to me. My heart began to beat faster as he stood in front of me, him looking down at me with a blank expression. I watched his hand slowly come up to the side of my face, gently pushing my blowing hair from my face. He cupped my cheek softly and locked his eyes with mine, tipped his head down towards me and breathed on my mouth.

"What are you doing?" I whispered and looked into his smoldering green eyes that were locked with mine.

"Doing what I should have done when we first met." His lips met mine in a soft kiss, our lips in sync with each other. His hand that was cupping my cheek made its way to the back of my head, pushing it into his gently. I ran my hands up his chest and locked my arms around his neck, standing on my tippy toes I pushed my hands through his hair and pushed down on his head to deepen the kiss.

He pulled back slightly, biting my bottom lip before letting it go. We stood inches from each others face, panting lightly and searching each others eyes before connecting our lips again. Our tongues swirled slowly together, our bodies crushed against each other, and our lips sliding against each other. My hands retracted from gripping his hair to finding their way to his face. I held his face gently as we continued to kiss. I pulled back slightly and wrapped my arms around his neck. Tim pushed his forehead against mine and closed his eyes. I grinned at him and pulled myself out of his grasp. I watched his eyes open and look down at me, his hands grabbing my waist and a sly smiling forming against his lips. Our bodies were still pressed against each others- they felt as if they were perfectly molded for the other. I got on my tippy toes and gently kissed him once move before pulled away completely.

"Have a nice night, Timothy." I smiled at him and slid into my car.


	11. Chapter 11

"What do you mean, you can't tell me what guy you went to SF to see?" My best friend Karli said, leaning into me and furrowing her eyebrows. "Is he cute?" A grin slipped across her red painted lips, her blonde and brown streaked hair being swung out of her face. "I need the gossip! Best friends tell each other things like this! If I meet a guy I tell you all about him, so why can't you tell me about your guy?" She whined as she leaned closer into me, picked up her cup of coffee and sipped it generously.

"I just..I just can't. It's hard to explain." I smiled sheepishly as I sipped my java chip.

Karli lowered her voice, "What's hard to explain? Did you sleep with him or something and you're embarrassed to tell me all the details? Was he really that bad in bed?"

My eyes widened and I laughed, "What! Who said anything about sleeping with anyone? I didn't. Seriously! Don't give me that look!" I laughed even harder as I watched Karli raise her eyebrows at me, suggesting that she didn't believe me.

"I swear, I didn't. Have I ever randomly slept with someone? You know me better than that, I have morals." I grinned and put my cup down onto the small table and crossed my legs, examining my ripped jeans and picking at the loose strings.

"Okay, so you didn't sleep with anyone. Then why can't you tell me who he is? It's not like he's someone important or famous, lets be serious here. There's no need to keep this a secret! I'd totally tell you if I was in your shoes!" She rolled her eyes and sighed dramatically.

My body froze and my head shot up to look at Karli's face, my eyes wide and my face blank.

"No fucking way," Karli whispered and moved her chair to me. "What the fuck? No joke, someone important or famous?"

"I don't know what you're on about." I scuffed at her advances and grabbed my drink quickly and began to drink, hoping that this conversation would end quickly.

"Liar, you're straight up lying to me right now! Who is he!" She whispered quietly and looked around to see if anyone was in earshot. "Tell me!"

"There's nothing to tell! I swear!" I laughed nervously and pushed my hair out of my face, never once looking Karli in the face in fear that she would see that I was deceiving her.

"Look at me, Savannah Kents. Look at me in the eyes and tell me that I have this all wrong."

I looked over at Karli and smiled softly, "You are completely wrong."

"I've known you for twelve years. Do you honestly think I wouldn't be able to tell if you were bullshitting me?"

"Listen, it's really not important at all. Seriously. Why does it even matter?"

"Do you want me to start naming off anyone remotely important in San Fran?" She suggested and grinned at me, leaned back in the chair and narrowed her eyes at me.

"Not really, I'd prefer if you didn't."

"I'll start with the obvious. The Giants." She cupped her hands and giggled as I ran my hand through my hair nervously. "It's a Giants player? Oh shit, this is good stuff right here!"

I leaned into her, whispering and looking at the people surrounding us, "Karli, we cannot be talking about this right now, okay? Seriously?"

"That's fine. Let's go to my place and we can talk about it then." I watched as Karli jumped up and grabbed her purse and her coffee, standing in her spot and staring at me- expecting me to jump up and join her.

"Please, Karli. Can we just drop this subject?"

Karli's eyebrows furrowed and she dropped her purse back onto the table and sat back down. "Brian Wilson?"

"For fucks sake, Karli! What the hell is the matter with you! I asked you not to talk about this here." I snapped angrily and put my hand over my eyes.

"So it is!"

I quickly tore my hand from my glasses, "No! Goodness! Jesus Christ, lets go to your place if we have to discuss this!" I suddenly stood up and grabbed my belongings and quickly exiting Starbucks and heading to my SUV. I unlocked my doors and slid into the drivers seat and locked my doors. I watched Karli strut out, wave to me, and get into her black Volvo. I grabbed my purse and found my phone and nervously dialed Tim's number.

I sighed in relief when I heard his smooth voice reach my ears, "Hey!" The smile in his voice was evident and I felt my worries melt away.

"H-Hi. I have a wee bit of a problem here." I said anxiously and looked over at Karli who was looking at me and still smiling. I looked down at my lap to avoid her gaze.

The panic was evident in his voice as he smoke, "What's wrong? Are you okay?"

"Mhm, yeah, i'm fine. The thing is..is that my best friend is making guesses on who you are. I haven't told her anything, but she's one sneaky bitch who figures everything out. She already guessed that you play for the Giants and she's guessed Brian. She wants me to go back to her place so we can talk..I don't know what to do." I sighed into the phone, tears stinging my eyes and my voice crackling.

"Babe, don't cry. It's okay. Listen, if you don't feel comfortable telling her then don't." His velvet voice pierced my ears and a smile crossed my lips.

I pushed away the one tear that fell, "It's not that I don't feel comfortable. It's more that I don't want to make you upset."

"Savannah, I would never get upset if you told your best friend about me. Hell, i've already told my best friend Drew about you weeks ago."

"Really? Okay, if you think it's okay. I don't want to step on your toes or anything."

I heard Tim laugh softly, "Step on my toes? As long as you don't tell random people and sell me out to the magazines or whatever I don't care. Just tell..I don't know..those that are close to you." He sounded so sweet and caring that I felt like a complete ass for even having a panic attack over this whole thing.

"Okay. Thanks." I spoke softly, smiling, "I miss you."

There was a slight pause before Tim spoke, "I miss you too, a lot. We haven't seen each other in four days."

"I know, I hate it. You should come out here. Tonight. We can hang out at my house."

"What about your mom?"

"She's spending the night at her boyfriends house and my sister took a trip up to Oregon. Please?"

I could imagine the smile that Tim, "Okay. Yeah, that sounds good. Will you cook me dinner or something?" He chuckled softly which made me grin and blush.

I said seductively and I lowered my voice lowered, "Is this some sort of date, Lincecum?"

He laughed nervously, "Actually, yes, it is. I'll bring over movies?"

"Hmm, okay. That sounds good. Remember, no meat. I'll be cooking something completely meat free."

"Yuck, seriously?"

"Yes, seriously! Don't worry, it will be good. I better get going though, Karli looks like she's getting frustrated."

"Alright, that's fine. Want me to come over around six?"

"Yeah, six is good for me."

I could hear the smile in Tim's voice as he spoke excitedly, "Okay! Awesome. I'll see you later then!"

I laughed, "Okay, have a good day!"

I put my car in reverse and drove out of the parking lot, looking in my rear view mirror to see if Karli was following. Indeed she was. We sped down the street and into her development, finding our destination I pulled out front of her apartment and turned my car off. I grabbed my purse from the passenger seat and climbed out of my car and began to walk up to where Karli stood.

"You took forever on the phone. Were you confirming with your boyfriend if you could tell me who he is?" She looked over at me as we walked to her front door, unlocking it and both of us walking into her apartment.

"Actually, yes. I was."

"So he IS someone important! Damn girl." I laughed at her and took at seat in her family room, propping my feet on her coffee table after slipped off my sandals. "So, who is he?" Karli egged me on, grinning at me and leaning towards me in her seat.

"Maybe i'll let you guess since you've already started."

She groaned and rolled her eyes, "Come on!"

I laughed at how pathetic she was being, "Fine. His name is Tim."

"No fucking way! Tim? As in Tim Lincecum? You're dating that babe?" She jumped out of her seat and threw her hands in the air, "This is crazy! Why didn't you tell me this ages ago!"

"Calm down!" I laughed and shook my head at her, she was incredibly overly dramatic over the silliest things. "I couldn't tell you. Well, I guess I could have but I didn't think I could. And were not dating, were just friends."

"Give me a break. Just friends? I don't buy it."

"We are just friends."

"But...but you two hangout a lot? You two kissed?"

"So? What does that have to do with anything?" I suggested, raising my eyebrows at her.

"Lets be serious here. You like him, he likes you."

"If were meant to date we will. Eventually."

"Eventually? What does that mean?"

"It means i'm not going to push this down his throat or force him to be with me. It is what it is. We enjoy each other's company. Yeah, I like him. I'm pretty sure he likes me as well. But that doesn't mean we should just jump into a relationship. Theres more to this than just dating."

Karli rolled her eyes, "Like what? Like you said, you both like each other. So date."

"Well, it's not as simple as you thing it is. We would have to keep our relationship on the DL. It would have to be very hush-hush since were both very private people. I'm sure he has crazy ass fans out there that would kill me. He travels a lot. He is under an immense amount of stress. There's just a lot we need to talk about and figure out. It's not as simple as any normal relationship." I shrugged my shoulders and leaned back into the couch and closed my eyes.

"True, true. When are you seeing him next? Do you think you'll bring all this up?"

"He's coming to my house tonight and i'm not sure if i'll bring it up. Who knows, he might bring it up. I don't know. Like I said, i'm not about to jump into this or rush it. All I know is that my feelings are real. I really do like him." My cheeks burned red as I revealed my feelings for Tim, Karli squealed and clapped her hands together.

"This is so awesome. My best friend is seeing a Giants player. You HAVE to hook me up with Brian Wilson."

I groaned, "Oh God, seriously? Brian is such a pain in the ass!"

"What! You met him! What is he like?"

"He's like a big pain in the ass, like I said. And of course I met him."

"This is just too much for me to handle," Karli said and massaged her temples and leaned back into her recliner and closed her eyes. We sat there quiet and my mind began to drift off to seeing Tim later that night.


	12. Chapter 12

No one ever explains how a relationship is supposed to come together as a masterpiece. There's not a handbook on what to do and how to handle certain situations when you're dating someone who has status quo. My feet pounded on the asphalt as I jogged down a quiet street in a quiet neighborhood in a small little city in the middle of nowhere. "Just one more mile," I whispered to myself as I ran past a small farm. It's been six months since my relationship with Tim ended abruptly, and I pushed myself everyday for months on end to believe that it happened for a reason. That we were not meant to be together. That it was a fluke he even had feelings for me. I haven't heard anything from Tim since the day I left him, and I guess it was for the best that he never contacted me, but it would have been nice to receive a simple text once in awhile. But then again, I never once tried to text him either but I know that he would never respond even if I did send him a message.

Tim never showed up for our date night at my house the day I told my best friend about our relationship. He never called me, texted me, and never once replied to my text messages and phone calls that I made frantically after not hearing from him. It scared me to death not knowing he is was okay, but he was okay. More than okay. Tim unexpectedly flew to Seattle to hang out with his friends who were throwing a get together in honor of his best friend Drew getting a promotion at his job. I never expected Tim to ask my permission about going somewhere, but it hurt deeply knowing that he didn't even let me know he was leaving. And the fact that he wanted to have a date night and never showed up killed even more. Did I not deserve a simple text message? Apparently not, because when Tim finally called me two days later he was confused about why I was so angry with him. I explained to him in great detail how I can't be in a relationship with someone who was so unconcerned about my feelings, who didn't care to let me know what's going on in his life. I went off and I let him have it completely, I didn't hold back on my feelings, my anger, and how unsure I was about our relationship.

"How can you say that? How can you say that I don't care about you?" I heard Tim snap back at my lashings. "If theres one thing I know, it's that I do care about you. So incredibly much, and it's killing me knowing you're unsure about our relationship."

"Tim, you left me. You LEFT me! Let's not forget that! I had a whole dinner planned out for us, for you. You never told me you were leaving to Seattle, you just up and left without explaining to me where you were going. You ignored my calls and texts for days. I just can't be in a relationship with someone who thinks so little of me that he can't even give me a courtesy call to let me know that he's okay."

I could feel my warm tears slipping down my cheeks. I push them away angrily and try to forget about my previous relationship. It's over with, it's done. I don't regret my decision to end the relationship, but I do regret pretending like i'm okay with everything. Karli finally stopped pestering me after two weeks and gave up all together about me hooking her up with Brian. I'm so grateful that I have such a good friend like her, she understood that I needed my own space and that I couldn't talk about Tim. I'll always care about Tim, and i'm sure if we had spent more time together that I could actually fallen in love with him. I stopped jogging all together and sat on the curb of the road and cried. My face fell into the palms of my hands and I cried hysterically.


End file.
